there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I just had sex on a roof
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Randomize
