It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
