Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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