I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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