I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
You can't special order awesome
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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