Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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