I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
