Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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