her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
