get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
