fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Boobs are out for the taking
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
