Texts From Last Night

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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.

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  (508): i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker. http://tfl.nu/03y7
  Replies (5) Good night (778) Bad night (867)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  You drink too much

  (1-561): View more from Florida

  No, I drink just the right amount - too often.

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  (561): You drink too much (1-561): No, I drink just the right amount - too often. http://tfl.nu/1oor
  Replies (2) Good night (2982) Bad night (644)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning

  (410): View more from Maryland

  how does that even happen??

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  (610): you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning (410): how does that even happen?? http://tfl.nu/16pg
  Replies (3) Good night (1951) Bad night (701)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.

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  (630): something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me. http://tfl.nu/yxh1
  Replies (28) Good night (1014) Bad night (4641)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place

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  (843): Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place http://tfl.nu/sgjx
  Replies (30) Good night (12723) Bad night (1531)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.

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  (832): My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking. http://tfl.nu/1gc1
  Replies (4) Good night (2149) Bad night (712)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.

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  (410): Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE. http://tfl.nu/kxu1
  Replies (7) Good night (3507) Bad night (1831)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.

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  (505): Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait. http://tfl.nu/lp7a
  Replies (6) Good night (2674) Bad night (706)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups

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  (610): Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups http://tfl.nu/eisr
  Replies (1) Good night (424) Bad night (704)
• Favorite

  (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure

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  (787): I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure http://tfl.nu/bq2q
  Replies (2) Good night (365) Bad night (600)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet

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  (734): I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet http://tfl.nu/92s9
  Replies (4) Good night (477) Bad night (480)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings

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  (208): Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings http://tfl.nu/oj8r
  Replies (0) Good night (284) Bad night (451)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.

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  (512): It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family. http://tfl.nu/7hfc
  Replies (1) Good night (460) Bad night (247)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.

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  (707): We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing. http://tfl.nu/w523
  Replies (2) Good night (710) Bad night (173)
• Favorite

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.

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  (506): Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM. http://tfl.nu/j72x
  Replies (2) Good night (269) Bad night (305)

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