Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
