the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
