His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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