doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
