my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
