But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
