He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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