You smell like stripper and shame
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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