things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Shame is for Republicans.
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