is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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