do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Randomize
