like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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