wat bout pragnant strippers??
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
