That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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