The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
