then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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