last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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