Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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