I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Randomize
