I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
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