He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
