just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Dignity is for republicans.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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