did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
