...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Enjoy the penises
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
