my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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