Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
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