singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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