so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
