She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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