the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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