i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
now i know why i became what i already was.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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