i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
