So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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