Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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