yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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