Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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