Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
