i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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