that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Randomize
