I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
